Jean Michel Jarre will use giant lasers to correct people’s vision and improve their eyesight

A very funny article talks about the latest way to improve eyesight - laser surgery for the masses at pop concerts. For the price of a ticket to a Jean Michel Concert the short sighted can correct their vision it is claimed!!! It does nothing to improve your hearing though.

French musician Jean Michel Jarre has announced that at all future performances he will be using his spectacular giant lasers to correct the eyesight of his fans.

‘For too long I have travelled the world using my lasers simply to enhance my own music,’ said Jarre, ‘but now I want to use them for good and give something back to my fans. I clearly can’t do anything to improve their hearing so the least I can do is give them 20-20 vision.’

Jarre, whose latest album, ‘Opticien’, is already a massive hit, will play a number of sell-out dates in which he performs insipid Euro synth-pop while simultaneously correcting the vision of everyone in the audience.

In a recent performance Jarre corrected the vision of over 5,000 fans. ‘It was amazing,’ said one man, ‘I went in with astigmatism and came out with perfect eyesight.

Jean Michelle Jarre says he hopes to perform giant laser eye surgery on over a million people as he travels the world, performing classics such as Oxygene and Equinoxe alongside newer works such as ‘Laser Corneal Reshaping’ and ‘Photorefractive Keratectomy’.

Jarre will also be making his giant lasers available for tattoo removal. However, the treatment will require patients undergoing a very painful repeat procedure in which they have to attend his gigs on up to six different occasions.

‘I would warn people to think very carefully before embarking on the Jean Michel Jarre treatment,’ said one expert, ‘his giant lasers are perfectly safe but continued exposure to his music could cause serious problems later in life.’

http://www.newsbiscuit.com/2011/01/16/jean-michel-jarre-to-use-giant-lasers-to-correct-people’s-vision/

This is a really interesting piece about the hazards of eye laser surgery. Whilst overall laser eye surgery is very successful there are a number of side effects and risks associated with it and these problems are often underplayed - dry eye, night vision etc. A few statistics here make interesting reading and the experiences of two employees of a leading eye surgery clinic are very revealing. http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/health/2003941235_lasik11.html

Eyeing the risks of LASIK eye surgery

This is a really interesting article on the hazards of eye laser surgery. Two people who worked at a high profile laser clinic themselves suffered major side effects and are quoted in it. There are some interesting statistics included and some warning issued by the US food and drugs administration. Very enlightening reading for anyone considering eye laser surgery. http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/health/2003941235_lasik11.html